I met two young people, 14 and 16 years old this weekend, who haven't made their first Reconciliations yet.
This doesn't seem to be abnormal at all around the church where I work. What is this resistance to confession on the part of them and their parents? They looked incredulous, nay, skeptical that I said that they had to do confession before Confirmation.
Are we missing something theologically and pastorally that makes people want to skip confession -- always and forever? I know numbers in the confessionals are down, but if we don't ever get them in there in the first place, how can they know what they are missing!?
3 comments:
When you give the parents and the children a date to come to reconciliation - and no attendance is recorded - a good chance is that not all the kids will be there.
So they will still have their first communion.
I recall some parishes that have had a passport system for both the First Reconciliation/Eucharist kids and Confirmation kids - that includes attendance at Sunday masses and at least one confession prior to the sacrament they are receiving.
If you read through the First Reconciliation program and First Eucharist for your diocese you would be surprised to see what the program is.
The Novalis book our parish used to use (as is recommended by our diocese) does not even mention the 10 Commandments for Reconciliation.
They switched to the Grade 2 Faith and Life series and this year our pastor who loves the English CTS publications - ordered books for the children from there.
I think not explaining it properly makes it scarier than explaining it as an opportunity to draw closer to God.
At the high school age - if they are not catechized - it gets harder to make them understand when they have so many other influences along with parents who have a distorted idea of the sacraments.
Fear may make them not want to have their Confirmation - if they have to go to Confession first.
Prayers are with you!
Pax Christi,
Teresa B.
Okay, I admit it: I dislike confession intensely. It's not that I don't understand the theology - I do! Honest! I just find the whole process really uncomfortable. Perhaps it is because I now work at a church, so the prospect of having my confession heard by colleauges is an unpleasant one. Perhaps it is because I don't like sitting in the confessional booth and would rather have a more "conversation-style" experience of the sacrament. I don't know. What I do know is that for me it's been a while.
T: Oh, believe me, I've read the material. I've worked it into our program. And we do record attendance. But some just seem to keep slipping through the cracks, and this is not a new problem in this particular church. Confession is required by canon law before Eucharist and Confirmation. It just doesn't make sense to me; somewhere down the line, we are failing our kids.
A: I find whenever I go by a church I don't know, that's when I'm most inclined for confession. I prefer face-to-face also, being of "that" generation, and I find that I certainly would never go where I work, but I can't even go to my previous parish. Too small a community, too many ears. So, when I'm away from home or happen by a church who is having confessions where I don't know the priest or anyone else, that's when I'll go. Not the best system for my soul, obviously, but until I get a priest-spiritual director, that's what I have to do.
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